Gret Ahlberg was about to quit after struggling with depression and panic disorder
Eugene. Great Ahlberg made a breakthrough during the World Cup.
After finishing ninth in the bobsleigh final, the 24-year-old talks about the mental illness that made her cut short her athletic career just two years ago.
– I wrote to my coach Matthias that I am not feeling well, hello then. They don’t hear from you if you don’t have to, she says in an open interview with Sportbladet.
Great Ahlberg He would not have participated in the World Cup. She wasn’t among the top 32 in the standings, but when Kajsa Bergqvist was asked to fire Ahlberg after her split, she seized the opportunity and called her home in Sweden and woke up throwing Hammarby in the middle of the night.
The rest is a little Swedish hack story. The highly emotional qualifier was followed by a final in which the Swede completed the second competition in her life over the 70m dream limit and finished ninth.
After that, Great Ahlberg was proud and thoughtful. When Sportbladet asks her about the trip to this place, she opens up about a very difficult time in life that is only two years apart.
– The first thing I think of now is that it was not clear that I would come here. Two years ago, I stopped my training and wrote to Matthias (Jones) “I’m not feeling well, hi then. Don’t hear back from you unless you have to. I have to take a break.”
“I wake up with panic disorder every day”
In a short time, a series of shocks caused Great Ahlberg to fall into a dark pit. She tried to maintain her athletic front and go to training, but at the beginning of the epidemic this was no longer possible.
Those who have felt bad and suffer from mental illness know that in the end it is not possible. She stares at the wall and starts laughing. I would wake up with a panic disorder every day and every morning very early and try to come back to life again. It could start something good like that…but then I thought it was the end.
How did you get out of this black hole?
I have a huge professional help at home and an environment that tells me I can do it and that I feel just fine. Being sad is okay, because I feel bad is good. When I started thinking it was okay to feel this way, it was so easy to get up again.
He took over throwing shoes after five minutes
That summer, the desire to train returned.
I saw a live competition in Sweden on screen in June 2020, one of the first during the pandemic. Then it took five minutes before I put on my shoes and ran to the training ground for the first time and thought I should now get up. Now damn it! It becomes very symbolic.
It went way faster than I dared believe. Both human and athletic.
When you make a decision about what you want in life and all of that, it becomes very clear. It is very motivating. If you prioritize your mood, you can take 9th place in the World Cup.
“I want to climb Mount Everest”
Now she can think about tough times and find strength, she says.
When my mom and I spoke after the playoffs, she said, “Think about you ran, two years ago you didn’t want to get out of your bed.” I just want to tell everyone who invests in something that you don’t have to be born for this. It went straight to the bottom for me and I just wanted to be a happy person again. It changed my thoughts about sports and found a completely different motivation to invest in sports. Only two years later, I’m here.
– Now I want to climb Mount Everest or sail across the Atlantic!